Back To December
by imnotevil13
Summary: It's been a month since the last time they talked to each other. The were buddy before, the best one to each other. But something has change that friendship thing. A one-shot I've wrote after listening one of Taylor Swift's songs. An apple pie life along with caring!Gabriel. Of course it's a happy ending fic.


**Here's my last chapter from my previous story. Hope you enjoy it :D**

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They sat at that cafeteria, met accidentally. It's been a month since the last time they talked to each other. The were buddy before, the best one to each other. But something has change that friendship thing.

Their small talk became smaller, there's minor talk between them and the atmosphere felt so heavy. Dean just sat at there, busy with his own coffee and Cass didn't dare to saw him. He just bowed his head all the time from the beginning.

A couple of minute after that, Dean rose up and muttering something about class to left Cass alone at that place. He walked on the counter and past some random chick with his charming smile which made her blushes in crimson red.

Cass just saw him from his chair and sighed heavily. There's something on his chest that made him hurt. People said it as jealous, but he named it as regret.

x

It's began in the night when the two of them sat on Dean's bedroom. Doing some work together like always. They talked to each other, about college, Cass's too-religious-uncle – Zachariah, Sam's grade, everything. And they enjoy that.

And then when the silent creep into that room, Dean said something about relationship. About Cass who never had a date since the first time they've met. The blue-eyed man just smiled faintly and ignored him.

"Don't tell me that you haven't a crush until now."

"Umm..., I don't know."

"Oh come on Cass, at least find some chick and –"

"Dean, it's not your business."

Dean blink once, "Well, okay, no offense. But, if there's someone who love you right now, would you love _them_ back?"

"Well, maybe. Wait a minute, _them_? What do you mean, Dean?"

Without a word, Dean moving from his place onto Castiel's side. They watched to each other, staring at the eyes before suddenly Dean closing the gap between them and kissed Castiel.

He could felt Cass's tense lips before finally melted into him. They kissed until lost of breath and pulling apart, but Dean's palm never leaved Castiel's cheeks. "That's what I mean."

Cass blushed deeply, but then his eyes widened in horror as if he remembered something. He push Dean away and wipe his lips, "What are you doing Dean!?"

"Cass, I love you buddy, so much."

"But we're boys!"

"I don't care about that –"

"But I _am_!"

"No you don't."

"This is wrong Dean, boys cannot love to each other more than friends. My uncle said –"

"Fuck your uncle! Don't you remember how much he hurt you? How much time he kicked you and your brother? Locked you in the bathroom, no food, no life, no love."

"But –"

"Come on Cass, it's your life, not your uncle's. I know how's your feeling right now. You love me, right? Please tell me that you love me back."

"I, uh, I'm..., not sure..."

"Cass..."

The little man gulped in answer, he saw Dean with his famous puppy eyes and sighed softly. "I'm sorry Dean." Then walked out the older Winchester's apartment not even bothering about his stuff on Dean's bedroom.

x

Back on present day, two days after they met, that was Castiel who standing in front of some apartment he familiar with. The cold of January breeze move softly caressing his pale cheeks while his body trembling slightly under his tan trench coat.

He sneeze quietly and his eyes move up from the parking load onto third floor, where Dean was life in. His lamp was still on and Cass could imagined Dean sat on his couch watching re-run with a bowl of popcorn on his lap.

He smiled faintly at that sight. So much Dean. But his smile disappeared when he remember what has he did in that December night.

x

Cass couldn't sleep. He just rolled over and over on his own bed. The meeting they had a week ago came over on his mind almost in every daily life. He sighed again and glance at his clock, one thirty in the morning, January 24th.

A bell ringing on his mind. It was Dean's birthday. He reach out his mobile and started to search Dean's number. But he stopped, just a second before he push the dial button.

He sighed, placed his mobile on his own side and rolled over again. Starred at the pale moon that hung on lazily in the middle of the night. Once again a hurt creep into his chest and a sense of burn covered his blue eyes.

In the middle of the night, in Dean's birthday date, a tear fall down from Castiel's eyes wetting his cheeks. With a whisper of '_I'm sorry Dean_' came out from his lips.

x

In a different night, a knock heard from Castiel's bedroom door. But the youngest Novak didn't said anything and after a second ones he heard Gabriel's voice shouting that he was gonna in.

"Cassie? Still alive?" He got a hum for answer. Gabe sighed in respond and walked toward Castiel who laying on his bed with his back facing Gabriel. The golden-brown haired man sat at there and breaking the silent with a command. "Tell me what happen."

Gabe could hear Castiel's long sigh before he answer him. "I met him, Gabriel. Like, a week ago. Not mad, but I could sense his guard was tense up all the time when he was with me - or met me." He rolled on his back so now he was facing his big brother who watched him with his brown eyes. "That's made me became more guilty."

"You loved him, right?" Cass nodded, "And he loved you back." Gabriel smirked at blushes-Castiel. "I know Dean Winchester, he will become a dick when someone turn him down – looking for another one I mean. But now, he's not, which that surprised me." He rose up, glance at Castiel before left and said, "Remember the day when you are still with him, Castiel. The feel that you felt at that time. Dean is still meeting you though, well, you've broke his heart. I'm sure he still could jerking off by the thought of you." That made Castiel as red as tomato and groaned in embarrassment. "It's your life, your choice, not someone else." After a waved of goodnight he disappeared behind the door.

Gabriel's line still ringing on Castiel's mind. And without a second thought, the memory of them when they were still a good buddy came over his brain. Like a movie in the middle of the night.

A face of Dean, talking to him, laughing or singing out loud in the impala, rolled his eyes when Cass got some-nerdy-thing with Sam, grinning all the time, and many more. And then he remembered the first time when he realize his feeling towards that Winchester, which made him accidentally having a dream about them and caught off guard by his step uncle after he release his need.

And a punishment he got after that was something he didn't want to remembered. Too much hurt and a disgusted look he got from his step uncle was enough to made him taken by Dean and live peacefully at Gabriel's apartment.

Yes, it was Dean who took him out from there. Rescue him from hell. After met Dean in college with bruised on his left-eye and another one on his lips and another one again all over his body then break down and crying in Dean's arm. It was the first time Castiel crying in front of someone else beside his only brother.

The comfort he got from Dean made him falling even more deeper towards this man.

But when Dean confessed his feeling all he could remember was violent he got from his step uncle. That's why he pushed Dean and leaved him. Hurting his own and Dean's heart. And the day after that, everything wasn't that normal anymore.

Castiel sighed on his pillow. He loved Dean, really do love him. But he afraid the distance between them will made Dean's feeling faded away. And worse, replaced by hate.

But then he remembered Gabriel's line before he said about some-life-thing. About Dean who never look up for someone else after he had a mess with him. And that made Cass gulped in nervous. Was it true? 'Cause if it true, he promised to God that he would love Dean with all of his life. He'll loved Dean Winchester with all of his heart in a better and right way.

He promised that. And he would looking for Dean tomorrow, doing what he should have done in the first place. Even though he must fought hard to break Dean's chain.

x

Just like Castiel. Dean's life was full of mess after they met at that cafeteria. The face of Castiel haunting him even more than before. He didn't like that but he couldn't resist against it. 'Cause Castiel was the one for him. 'Cause he has fallen head over heel towards that little man with blue eyes and pale yet soft skin. Even though he ever tried to forget him, he always ignored every girl who confess at him and didn't gave a damn for some random chick who wanna get into his pants.

God he missed him. He missed Castiel.

Then, in some random night, there's a knock on Dean's apartment. But he was too tired for having some random guest. He just keep on his silent and walked through his bedroom.

And then there was a second knock, even more louder than the previous one. Dean keep on his silent pretend not in home. But then a voice come out after some pregnant pause made his eyes widened and held his breath.

"Um Dean, it's me. I know you were at there and I'm sorry for disturbing you like this. But," Cass bit his lips, "I just want to say something and I hope you wish to hear me." He paused, no answer from inside but he believe that Dean was still at there. Standing behind this door just like him. "I, uh, I wanna said I'm sorry Dean, about that night. That December night when you were..., uh..., well, I believed you know what I mean. I'm sorry about what I've done to you, I meant it Dean. And I want you to know that it was hurting me too, 'cause –" he gulped, "'Cause I love you Dean. Really do love you. The reason my uncle – _step_ uncle – punished me back then was because he found out that I was falling in love with you. He kept saying about stuff while he _'give me a lesson'_. And that scared me Dean, not what my step uncle's words but it was what he has done to me." A tears began to falling from his eyes. "Every time I feel my feeling for you, my body remember those kicks, slaps, and everything. That's why I pushed you, I didn't mean to turn you down, Dean. I love you. But my trauma still lingering me and it hurt me even worse when I can't close to you. It hurt me Dean." He sobbed, "I missed you."

A second after that a click heard and the door slowly opened. Cass was tried to say something to him but his words was interrupted even before he began to say it because Dean was pulling him into his apartment. Closed the door with his back while both his arm hugged Castiel tightly.

Without a second thought, Cass lifted up his arms and hugged Dean back. They standing like that for a couple of minutes.

"I'm sorry," it was Dean who broke the silent. "I'm sorry for avoiding you, I'm sorry for not understand you. I'm sorry Cass." He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with Castiel's scent.

"It was me who must said sorry, Dean. For not telling you the truth. I'm missed you, and I was so stupid for not following my heart."

Dean chuckled, he pulled his body from Castiel and kissed that man's cheek. The little man shivered and Dean watched him with concern. "Still remember?"

"A little." Cass sighed and glance at Dean, "I'm sorry about that night, Dean."

"Shhh..., it's okay Cass, it was my fault too. The important things right now is that you're standing at here, _with me_. I love you gorgeous."

Cass blushes at that nick-name. He lowered his head to hide his face but Dean's finger lifted it up so they were facing to each other again.

"God, you even more gorgeous when you like this." He chuckled when Cass groaned in respond. They silent for a moment, still on each others arms. "May I kiss you, Cass?"

"Uh, huh?" he blushes again, "Well, uh, o-okay."

Dean move his hand from Castiel's hips onto his cheeks and caressing it softly. The blue-eyed man purred on his touch and gasped when Dean's lips touch his. His body trembling when he remember that violent, but it disappeared a little when he heard a comfort words from Dean between their kisses.

They pulled apart, forehead touching. "I love you Cass, and I'm promised I'll healed your mess memory if you let me."

"Thanks Dean," he lifted up a little and brushes his lips with Dean, "I love you."

So, this is Castiel. Who traveled through time back on his December night in a different way. To change his fate and found his own life which full of love from a man he knew so much. A man who will loved him and be there for him 'till the death do them part.

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**Not so awesome right? But I still hoped you like it :D I wish to meet you again guys, you're marvelous. Please review. :D_  
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